What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

Do you know what she said mum?

Why am I so jealous towards couples? Why am I tired of being single and feel my life is over?

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

Is it possible to make cars that run on water instead of gasoline or other fossil fuels? Why haven't we done so yet?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

How do I explain to my husband that my 19-year-old son has accidentally gotten me pregnant?

What! how could you do that?

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

What do you mean son?

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Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

True - how I loved my mum!

How did you become popular in school?

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?